After months of staring at snow and bundling up to walk to the mailbox, salvation is finally here! With all due respect to Jesus and his birthday, this is the “most wonderful time of the year” — Masters Week.

As you open up your phones or tablets to read this, I want to apologize because I won’t have my phone on me all day today.

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Look — there’s nothing easy about the Masters. Whether it’s qualifying for the tournament or just getting as a patron, the Masters makes most people’s bucket list due to the exclusivity and stature.

In fact, the only thing easy about the Masters is making money betting on it — kind of.

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It’s late on a Wednesday night here in Western Massachusetts, and I’ll be honest — there’s nothing I’d like to do less than write this piece about the Shell Houston Open. I’m sorry. My heart is already in Augusta, Georgia. My head, filled with dreams of pimento cheese sandwiches and Jim Nantz-isms. I know you’re all there, too. 

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The world’s best golfers spent last week in Austin for the one of the year’s alternate format events — the Dell Technologies Match Play Championship. For most, the bracket-style format is a favorite — especially during March Madness — but most are just glad it’s over.

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The world’s best golfers are in Austin, Texas this week for the Dell Technologies Match-Play Championship. As we all know, that means anything and everything can happen. Just like the NCAA’s “March Madness” tournament, you can expect upsets galore followed by a No. 1 seed inevitably winning the damn thing. 

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The PGA Tour heads east across the state of Florida to Orlando for the Arnold Palmer Invitational at the Bay Hill Club and Lodge. Last year, Marc Leishman kept the field at bay — but this year, there’s a certain big cat lurking, looking to breakthrough to the winner’s circle. 

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Hello, friends and degenerates! It’s time once again to weed out the weak from the strong! The players from the posers! The best from the rest! This week, the PGA Tour rolls into Orlando for the Arnold Palmer Invitational — the next chance to line your pockets with income your wife doesn’t know about! 

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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